Done

I Ryan St. George on this fifth day of January 2010 declare that I will remain free of illicit substances and alcohol. To be blunt, the shit makes me crazy and fucks with my brain in a way that normal people would never experience. I feel like I need the help of the district in order to do this since most of my indulgences have been in the company of the occupants. I needs your help, my friends. I do think that I'm strong enough to do this alone. I have done it before for literally years on end. But you all know how impulsive I am and how I am willing to throw things away at the strike of a match. Please don't let me even have a beer, don't offer me anything except the occasional cigarette. And when we go out I have no problem being the all time driver. I never really enjoyed the effects of alcohol with my mixture that much anyways. It just fucks up my thinking and motor skills. I just like the self destructive aspect of drinking, the idea of it mostly and the feeling of having a beer in my hand.


So that's it. I don't regret anything. I'm glad I did everything but I am well now and if I were to continue down this road I would most certainly be unwell in the very near future.


And do you really want to visit me in a hospital?

And do you really want to see my brain on Zyprexa or some other Dopamine blocker that will essentially kill me and all of my creative and expressive talents and powers?

So help me out guys and I'll do my best to stay true.

with love,

-Ryan 1/1/10 11:13am